Seven Ways to Help Your Child Relax When They’re Anxious

There are many reasons that children become anxious; tests at school, bullying, separation from their parents, or simply by being exposed to anxious adults, amongst other reasons. Some children suffer from anxiety disorders that leave them feeling like this with very little reason. The problem is that a child with anxiety is likely to become stressed more easily and have a lower tolerance to stress and anxiety. They are then unable to unwind and relax effectively by themselves. As a parent, you can play an important role in helping them learn to relax significantly easier.

There are many things that may or may not help relax your child. What works in one case of child anxiety may not work for others. You will have to experiment with various things to help relaxation when your child is suffering from anxiety. Here are seven things to consider and try.

1. Be mindful of your own anxiety.
It is an unfortunate fact that children are very responsive to the feelings of those people around them. This means than when you yourself or other people that they love are anxious, they are likely to pick up on that and become anxious too.

Be confident and self assured around them, even if this is an act, and they are likely to relax about the situation too.

2. Distract your child in any way possible.
A major part if the problem with child anxiety is the risk of them focusing on the feelings that they are experiencing. Instead of dealing with it and moving on they dwell on it and make themselves worse focusing on their uncomfortable anxious feelings.

Distracting them helps by breaking the cycle and allowing their body to let the stress reaction fade. It can be achieved in any number of ways, such as putting on a movie, taking them out of the house or away from the stressful situation or playing a game with them. They might even be helped by having a friend visit.

3. Music.
Music is more than just a distraction. The right kind of music can help your child to relax, or can help them to vent their anger. There are so many different genres of music, and many varieties within them. Each may have a different affect on your child’s emotions. Try various genres to see what helps and talk about the music to help them focus on it instead of their anxiety.

4. Aromatherapy.
Aromatherapy has long been known to help children relax. There are specific essential oils that are helpful for relaxation. Lavender for instance is particularly relaxing.

There are various ways that aromatherapy can be used. Some oils are suitable for adding a couple of drops to a warm bath, which in itself is relaxing. A couple of drops of lavender and some other oils can be put on a child’s shirt. It should be noted though, that most oils cannot be applied to the skin or clothing at full-strength. Instead they must be diluted with a suitable carrier.

Carriers include massage oil and bath products that are mixed with the oil before use. Lastly, some oils are effective when just inhaled, and can be put into a burner, or other warmer.

5. Massage.
Massage is another widely studied and acknowledged relaxation technique. It is especially effective with younger children, older children may be resistant to being exposed, or having too much physical contact. Massage is especially effective when combined with relaxing aromatherapy oil.

6. Talk to your child.
Try and find out what is making them anxious, or what they are afraid of. Then try to reason with them as to how to solve the problem or overcome the fear. Younger children may struggle to put their feelings into words but there are two techniques that may help them to vent their feelings.

Firstly, you can encourage story telling. The child tells a story about a child who feels the way that they do. They give names and descriptions to the characters in the story that represent themselves, and the thing they are afraid of. More importantly they can then tell in story form of how that child overcame their anxiety.

This can help them to relax by showing them that there are ways to overcome the problem. Other children may be helped by drawing pictures representing their anxiety.

7. Reassure your child.
Reassurance and simply having you near can help many children with anxiety to relax. Some children may suffer anxiety over the fear of failing to please you, for instance when they have a school test coming up. Reassuring them that you will always love them and be proud of them no matter what the outcome of the test is, can help them to relax.

The same is true of other situations. Remind them that you will always be there for them, you will always collect them from school or daycare or from their other parent’s house. This may help them to relax and overcome separation anxiety. However it is important to never promise things that you cannot guarantee. Failure to follow through on a promise can lead to them losing trust in you, making reassurance ineffective in the future.

Children with anxiety frequently have needs that may not seem appropriate for their age. An older child may need to be cuddled, held, sang to. They may even need to be rocked or to thumb suck-things that they may otherwise have outgrown. Don’t be afraid of babying them if they need it.

As a final note, although it is normal for children to occasionally experience anxiety, prolonged periods of child anxiety are not normal. They should not be ignored, because with proper treatment, children with anxiety can do much better and enjoy the happy life they were meant to have.

If you suspect your child may be suffering from anxiety, click below to learn more about what you can do to help:

Click here to learn more about your child’s anxiety and what you can do to help